Obviously Stupid
by RichardShaft
Summary: Do not read this if you are a fan of Angel. I wrote this as kind of a laugh or poke in fun at Angel. Basic premise of the story goes sometimes the truth can be right in front of you and you either don't want to see it or not smart enough to see it. This is a Buffy/Xander fic. I don't want any hate from any Angel lovers as I have made it clear this isn't a piece meant to flatter him


It seemed like everything had been turning up Angel the last 6 months. Buffy had finally made her choice between Spike and him and she decided that her heart would always belong to him. They decided to get a house together. Buffy wanted to be close to her family so they bought a house in Cleveland across the street from Xander, Dawn and Willow.

Dawn, Willow and Xander decided it would be cheaper to live together. Not to mention living together just seemed to fit. It was Xander's hiatus from the slayer school. It wasn't that he didn't want to help but he felt it was time he lived outside of the darkness for a while. Buffy and Willow had seen how happy Xander was and it didn't take them long to decide they wanted a piece of that.

Angel was the only piece of Buffy's life left that was supernatural. Buffy had decided that it would probably be best if Angel had his own bedroom and Buffy had hers. The last thing they wanted to do was temp fate and release Angelus with a moment of happiness.

It was just after sundown and Angel was at the local grocery store. Buffy gave him a list of things she need, The pain in the ass of it all was that he couldn't go to one store and be done. To get everything on the list it took 6 different stores from one side of town to the next. He chalked it up to the things you do for love.

All six stores took him just over four hours. He pulled in to the drive way and grabbed the grocery bags from the back seat. As he walked in to the house he heard the shower running. He took the bags to the kitchen setting them on the table and headed up the stairs to the bedroom and Buffy's private bathroom. He stepped in to the room and called out. "Hey Buffy I'm home." He reached for the bathroom door turning the knob. As he stepped in he saw something he wasn't expecting. A very naked Xander was soaping up.

Xander quickly spun around trying to get some privacy. "Angel what the hell?"

Angel not wanting to see Xander's bare ass turned around "What are you doing in Buffy's shower."

Buffy came running in to the room a towel around her. "Angel."

Angel looked at Buffy confused. "I thought you would be in the shower."

Xander yelled at him. "Close the damn door."

Angel quickly jumped out pulling the door shut. Buffy looked at him. "What are you doing just storming in the shower?"

Angel shrugged. "I thought it was you. What is he doing in your shower?"

Buffy looked up at the ceiling. "It's kind of funny. IT was a few minutes after you left and there was an issue with the sink. So I called Xander up to come take a look at the pipes."

Angel looked confused. "Something is wrong with the pipes?"

"Well not anymore. Xander fixed it."

"That still doesn't explain why he is in the shower."

"Well he loosened one of the pipes and as he did so it just made this huge mess. It was a disgusting mess that cover him in sink sludge."

"So he took a shower to get cleaned up?"

"It was the right thing to do. I mean he got all dirty cause of me."

Angel scratched his head. "But that doesn't explain why you are in a towel."

"You see it's like this I was helping him. I handed him tools under the sink and when he got covered I got covered. He was taking a shower upstairs and I used the shower down here."

Angel shook his head. "God I feel awful. I should apologize to Xander." He put his hand on the door knob ready to walk in Buffy grabbed his hand stopping him.

"Angel he is in the shower and naked I am pretty sure it can wait tell he's out."

He just smiled and laughed. "Right. I can be so absent minded sometimes."

Buffy just offered him a weak smile. "Go put the groceries away you can talk to Xander when he's out of the shower."

Angel nodded skipping down to the kitchen. A few minutes later Xander came down the stair. Angel sniffed the air. He turned to him and looked confused. "A little heavy on the cologne aren't you?"

He put his hands in his pockets looking down at the ground. "Well I figured better to smell like Ralph Lauren than sink sludge."

Angel put the last bag of groceries away and turned to him. "I guess I owe you a thank you. I guess we are lucky to have a handy man across the street in a pinch."

Buffy came down the steps dressed in some comfy pajamas. She looked at Xander. "I think we are very lucky."

Xander shook his head. "Not a big deal."

Angel sniffed the air again. This time his attention was turned to Buffy. "You are wearing perfume too."

She just nodded. "Don't want to smell like."

Angel interrupted. "Sink sludge. Xander said the same thing."

Xander looked at the two of them. "I should probably get going."

Angel pulled out his wallet. "Well can I give you something for fixing the pipes."

Xander just smirked and shook his head. "Just doing the neighborly thing." With that he waked out the front door.

Angel looked at Buffy. "I know I spent so many years hating that guy but I really have to admit Xander is a nice guy."

Buffy nodded in agreement. "I've known that a while now." She put her hand up to her mouth yawning. "Well I'm pretty tired. I think I'm going to go to bed."

"Wait. You are tired?"

"Worn out."

"Oh." He looked disappointed but understood. "Kiss good night honey."

"Of course." She game to him and instead of a kiss on her mouth she pecked him on the check. "Night."

Angel stayed up most of the night watching television. Just before sun up he retreated to his room in the basement. He slept for a good part of the day and when he came up he found a note on the table.

_Angel_

_Went to the State Fair. I stocked up the fridge with some blood. I will see you later. _

_ Love Buffy_

He went to the fridge pulled out the blood and put it in the microwave. He picked up the newspaper and grabbed the mug as the timer went off. He sat at the kitchen table sipping the blood and reading. He smiled thinking he was so lucky to have such an amazing girlfriend who took care of him as good as she did. The blood was a special blend only one butcher shop in town carried and the fact that she went out of her way to pick it up showed she was thinking of him.

It was just before midnight when Buffy and Xander came in to the house leaning on each other a little drunk. Buffy was carrying an over sized stuffed pig. Angel stood in the doorway. "You too look like you had fun."

Buffy stumbled over to Angel and laughed. "Yes we did Angey Wangey. We had so much fun at the state fair we didn't save any for anyone else."

Xander laughed obviously drunk himself. "We were fun pigs." He pointed to the stuffed pig Buffy was carrying. "Get it. Pigs."

Angel rolled his eyes at the bad joke. "You guys are drunk."

Xander snapped his fingers and pointed at Angel. "Drunker than a pot full of really fun monkeys."

Buffy squinted looking confused. "Monkeys don't get drunk."

Xander shrugged. "They'd be a lot more fun if they did."

Buffy and Xander busted out laughing again. Angel just shook his head. "So what is with the pig?"

Buffy held it up like a trophy. "I'm going to call him Gordo Xtreme." She brought it down so she could look at him snout to face. "Xander won him for me."

Angel looked at Xander. "What game did you win it at?"

Xander tried to remember. "It was that one. You know where you have to do the thing to the other thing."

Buffy jumped in being just as vague and confusing. "And then you have to pick a thing. He picked a pig."

Xander shrugged and walked past Angel. "Pigs are awesome. We can have the bacon and sausage and pork chops."

Buffy walked past him finishing Xander's thought. "And Angel can have the blood."

Angel followed them in to the kitchen. "So beside pigs and booze was there anything else at the fair."

Xander nodded looking excited as he spoke. "Oh yeah they had fried snickers bars."

Buffy nodded. "Those were so good. But they had fun rides too. We went on a double Ferris wheel and the tilt a whirl and tunnel o love."

Xander made a face. "The haunted house was lame."

Angel just sat on the edge of the table. "Night is still young Buffy we could do something if."

Buffy made a sad face. "Oh crap Angel. We just stopped by cause I wanted to pick up my pajamas."

Angel looked confused. "Why do you need those."

Buffy rolled her eyes. "Well I can't stay at Xanders in the nude."

Xander looked up from the fridge joking. "Yes you can."

She laughed hard and Angel just looked more confused. "Why are you staying at Xanders?"

Xander grabbed a jar of olives out of the fridge and popped on his mouth. "We are doing a movie night."

Buffy looked at Xander from the other side of the room. "Shoot me an olive."

Xander reached in to the jar pulling one out and tossing it through the air and in to Buffy's mouth perfectly. He put his hands up like he just scored a touchdown. "Suck on the Peyton Manning."

Angel looked at them "FOCUS Drunkies."

Buffy turned to him. "Oh sorry. Yeah we are going to watch some movies. I mean you could come with us but the whole no curtains thing and I don't want to see you get burned in the morning."

Xander put the jar back on the Olives. "Sorry Angel. My place not really what you call vampire friendly."

Angel again a little dejected but understanding nodded. "No it's fine. I get it. I hope you guys have a good night."

Buffy looked at him. "Well spend some time together tomorrow." She went to him and gave him a kiss on the cheek." Buffy ran up the stairs to her room and pulled out a sexy victoria secret number. She carried it down the stairs ready to go.

Angel looked at her confused. "You are wearing that?"

Buffy shrugged. "What's wrong with this?"

"Well you know isn't' it a little sexy for a movie night with friends?"

Buffy looked at her. "It's all I have. I mean you were supposed to do the laundry and I could have grabbed my puppy dog pj's."

Angel nodded and sighed. "I'm sorry I should have done the laundry."

Xander came behind Angel slapping him on the back. "Besides Angel it's just me. I mean she's my friend. Maybe once upon a time you had to worry but come on. That is past us."

Angel nodded. "Yeah I'm sorry it was silly."

Buffy looked at him. "And remember sweetie. You won. I chose you. I chose you over Spike even."

Xander feeling drunk patted his shoulder. "You are one masculine son of a bitch. I wish I could be you."

Buffy laughed again. "You are way to drunk Xander."

Xander shrugged. "It's time to go Buffy our movie night awaits."

Buffy grabbed Xander's elbow walking out with him "Laters Angel."

Angel watched them cross the street then went back to the couch and turned on the television. As the sun came up Angel went to sleep in the basement. When it went down again he was expecting to see Buffy. He was considering going over but didn't want to seem to clingy. 2 and a half days had passed and Angel hadn't seen or heard from his girlfriend. He was starting to have concerns.

To the slaying community Buffy might have been on break but that didn't mean her head wouldn't make an amazing trophy. The demon who ended Buffy Summers would be held at a God like status. By day 3 clingy or not Angel needed to end his worry. He figured he would talk with Willow,Dawn and Xander. They were most likely the last people to see her.

Angel crossed the street just as Dawn's fire engine red Prius pulled in to the parking lot. Dawn saw Angel and immediately looked away. Angel crossed to the drive way to greet Dawn. "Hey Dawnster."

Dawn went to the back of the Prius and grabbed some groceries out of the back. "Hello Angel."

Angel quickly stepped to the back of the Prius. "Hey I can help you carry some of those in."

"Oh it's okay Angel I can get this."

Angel smiled at her. "Don't be silly I am here. What kind of boyfriend would I be to Buffy if I wasn't to help out her sister."

She just smiled awkwardly. "Yeah I guess."

They carried the bags to the door and Dawn turned around. "You can set them on the porch I can get them from here."

Angel laughed "Dawn it's okay. I actually wanted to talk to you about your sister."

Dawn looked worried. "Buffy? Something wrong with Buffy?"

"She's gone missing. She hasn't spoke to me in a few days. She hasn't tried to reach out. It's not like her."

Dawn only felt more awkward about it. She put the keys in the lock and opened the door as she stepped inside. She spoke very loudly almost in a yell. "Come on in ANGEL. Put the groceries in the kitchen ANGEL."

The huffing and panting that could be heard from the porch was louder though. "HARDER XANDER. GOD DON'T STOP."

Angel looked up at the ceiling here it. "What the hell is going on."

Dawn yelled "ANGEL WAIT."

Suddenly the panting and shouting stopped. Angel looked at the ceiling. "That's Buffy's voice."

Dawn suddenly looked panicked. She wanted to say something but couldn't find the words. Angel ran up the steps skipping two steps at a time. Angel stood behind the door. "BUFFY are you okay in there."

A panicked Buffy yelled. "Just a minute."

Angel reached for the knob finding it locked. "Buffy what's wrong." When he got no response he quickly thrust his shoulder against the door breaking the door in. As he entered the room he found Buffy on top of Xander she had a wooden stake in her hand and straddled him ready to stake him. Buffy was in short shorts and a sports bra while Xander was wearing sweat pants.

Xander looked at Buffy. "You got me."

Angel looked on confused. "What the hell are you doing?"

Buffy quickly jumped up and dropped the stake. "Uhm Xander was helping me to train." She said the words slowly wanting to get it out perfect.

Xander followed her speech pattern. "Yep we were training."

Angel covered his nose. "What is that awful smell?'

Xander pointed to a bottle of bleach that was open and sitting over the exhaust fan. "Well we made a mess and spilled something on the floor so we needed some bleach to kill the smell."

Angel looked at Buffy. "You know you could always train with me. I mean I am after all a vampire."

Buffy jumped up and off of Xander. "Baby I don't want to even play like that with you. I mean what if I hurt you."

Angel shrugged "I'm pretty strong." Xander walked past Angel and to the now broken lock and door.

Xander shook his head pissed "What the hell Angel?"

"I'm sorry I thought Buffy was in danger and."

Buffy stood next to Xander. "Angel you can't just come charging in busting stuff up. We live in suburbia now."

Angel nodded in agreement. "I'm sorry. I just thought." He shook his head. "It was 3 days since I seen you and I was worried. I mean the last time we talked you said you were doing a movie night. I haven't heard from you in 3 days."

Xander looked confused. "Movie night? Oh right. I mean movie night. That was a hell of a good movie night."

Buffy had a wicked smirk on her face. "I could watch that movie over and over again."

Angel looked confused. "But you didn't come home."

Buffy quickly focused. "Oh well uhm I fell asleep on the couch and then Xander came up with an idea. It's an idea An amazing idea."

Angel leaned against the doorframe. "What kind of idea?'

Buffy smiled playing with her hands as she talked. "Xander's construction company is getting off the ground and I am trying to adjust to life as something other then a slayer. So Xander needs more help. Who is better at construction then a slayer. I mean I have the raw power. I can lift and move things easily. It is the perfect fit."

Xander nodded in agreement. "Buffy is quick learn in the field of construction."

Angel opened his mouth. "So you guys are working together now?"

Buffy nodded smiling. "It's perfect really."

Angel looked at Xander. "Maybe I could join. You know I have the whole power and vampire speed."

Xander sighed. "That would be great Angel but we don't really do construction work during the night."

Angel looked at Buffy. "I wish you would have talked to me about this before you did this. We are a couple and as a such choices like this we should make together."

Buffy's eyes watered up like a little girl being scolded. "Angel I just wanted to have a normal life. I wanted to have some normal."

Xander looked at him in disgust. "You would rather her life be about the dark."

Buffy shook her head wiping away the tears. "Spike would have encouraged me to have a life in the sun."

That was all it took for Angel to change his tune. "Wait I'm sorry Buffy. I didn't think. I" He took her hand. "I'm sorry Buffy I shouldn't have said anything."

Buffy kept the water works flowing. "You are just saying that."

Angel shook his head. "No I mean it. I'm happy that you have this." He looked at Xander. "Xander thank you for helping Buffy. Thank you for helping her to find something new."

Xander looked at him skeptically. "And you are okay with this?"

Angel nodded. "I'm thrilled with it."

Buffy looked at him wiping the tears. "Even though it means I'm going to have to spend most of my time at work."

Angel nodded. "As long as you are happy."

Buffy lunged at Angel hugging him. "You are the best." She kissed the side of his cheek.

Angel looked at the door he broke. "I'm sorry about the door again."

Buffy took Angel's hand. "The thing about this job." She started walking with Angel down the steps and to the door. "We leave at 6 AM. Now I don't drive cause."

Xander just stood in the doorway. "Cause she's a driving terror of death behind the wheel."

Buffy laughed but didn't argue. "So I am going to commute with Xander in the morning."

Angel nodded and Dawn stood at the bottom of the steps not believing what she was hearing. Angel just looked to her. "Well that's a good idea."

Buffy continued squeezing his hand. "But being that 6 in the morning comes so early it probably would be better if I stayed here on nights I work."

Angel looked confused. "Stay here."

Buffy nodding. "Well you know just crashing on the couch. I've already brought some clothes over. Xander has been so nice. He lets me keep them in the dresser and he put his clothes in the closet"

Angel looked at her. "So you'd be spending most of your time here?"

Buffy nodded. "For the job."

Angel wanted to object but again he thought to Spike He needed to show Buffy she made the right choice. He needed to show Buffy she made the right choice. "I think that's a spectacular idea."

Dawn had a look of shock and awe on her face. "REALLY. Really?"

Buffy looked at Dawn. "Put the groceries away Dawn." She turned back to Angel. "Besides think how awesome it will be. The whole absence makes the heart grow fonder. I can only see you a couple days a week it will make me miss you so much more."

Angel nodded. "And we can make the most of our weekends. They will be awesome."

Buffy nodded. "Exactly."

Xander faked a yawn looking at Buffy. "Oh boy I am exhausted I think I'm going to bed."

Buffy nodded faking her own yawn. "Yeah I know what you mean."

Angel looked at his watch. "But it's only 8:23"

Xander smiled. "6 AM comes fast got to get some sleep."

Buffy nodded "So this is good night."

Angel nodded. "Yeah I guess so." He leaned forward moving in for a kiss. Buffy gave him another quick peck on the check.

"Night Angel." With that he stepped out the door and crossed the street to his house.

Dawn looked shocked. "COME ON! He can not be that stupid."

3 months had passed and Xander's small construction start up was quickly making a name for itself. Angel had been fully supportive of Buffy's choice of career. Then one day in March everything had changed. Who'd of thought that peeing on a stick could change everything so dramatically.

Buffy had paced back and fourth trying to think of the right way to tell Angel she was with child. Willow knew the situation could be tense so they thought the best way to do it would be ease him in to it over a nice hot meal.

Xander had skipped down the steps the smell of prime rib in the oven. He looked at Buffy. "Is it wrong that I am going to miss the whole sneaking around thing?"

Buffy was setting the silverware on the table. "I'm not sure if what you can call what we did sneaking. I'm just thinking he's kind of uhm."

Dawn came down the steps ready to eat. "Captain Oblivious."

Just then the doorbell rang as Buffy looked at the door knowing it was Angel. "Its time do this." She swallowed the lump in her throat. "Hello Angel."

Angel carried in a bottle of nice red wine. He looked at the red dress Buffy was wearing. "The dress is nice. Is it new?"

Buffy nodded. "Yeah I bought it a few days ago."

Angel laughed. "You don't have much clothes left at the house."

Xander came to them. "So I am starving I say we eat."

Angel handed Xander the wine. "I brought this for everyone."

Xander took out the cork screw. "Very generous."

As they sat down to eat Buffy was the only one to pass on the wine. She looked at Angel. "So there is a reason I am not drinking Angel. It's the same reason we called you here for supper. We wanted to talk to you."

Angel looked at her. "What's going on?"

Buffy opened her mouth forgetting everything she rehearsed finally she said. "Ya see it's like this." She took the pregnancy test and slid it in front of him.

Angel picked up the stick and examined it. He looked on silent for a minute. Xander finally felt the need to say something. "I know this is difficult Angel."

Angel shook his head. "Not really that difficult Xander. This has happened before."

Xander's jaw dropped. "Who did this happen to you before with?"

Angel put the test down. "Darla."

Buffy looked confused. "What does Darla have to do with anything?'

Angel looked at Buffy. "Her and I had a child together. We didn't think two vampires could make a child but it happened."

Xander looked at him. "But you and Buffy. I mean the whole moment of happiness thing never happened with you two."

Angel shrugged. "Well if two vampires can make a baby then 1 vampire and 1 human has to be easier. The powers that be must have had a hand in this. Kind of like an immaculate conception."

Dawn shook her head and dropped her silverware. "Come on Angel."

Angel shook his head looking at Dawn. "You should be happy you are going to be an aunt."

Dawn stood up. "I just want to make sure I got this straight. The most obvious answer to you is that Buffy is pregnant with your child. It is some kind of mystical pregnancy because you never had sex with her. The powers that be or some mystical force has a hand in this."

Angel nodded. "It's obvious if you think about it."

Dawn threw her hands up. "COME ON ALREADY."

Angel knelt down touching Buffy's belly. "Hey little one I can't wait to meet you."

Buffy opened her mouth confused ready to say something. "I uhm. I"

Xander shook his head. "Hey let's eat."

Dawn shook her head muttering, "No one can be this oblivious."

6 months in to the pregnancy Buffy came up with the idea that had to send Angel over the edge. If he didn't catch on after this he never would. Along the way they had dropped every hint possible. It had become there own private game. How far could they go before Angel caught on.

Of course it should be Xander who attends the birthing classes with Buffy cause if she went in to labor during the day Angel wouldn't be able to be there with her. Of course a pregnant woman shouldn't be sleeping on the couch and Xander had the bedroom with the bathroom so it made sense they share a bed.

Dawn had even set it up for Angel to catch Buffy and Xander in the shower together Of course Buffy quickly explained that the shower floor was slick and if she fell she could hurt herself and the baby. So Xander was there in case she fell. As long as she was there he might as well help to wash her.

The next day Xander was sitting on the couch Buffy was in his lap while Dawn sat across from him. Dawn shook her head. "Buffy how the hell can he not know."

Buffy shrugged "Who knows?"

Xander nuzzled Buffy's neck. Then came up offering his own explanation. "It's like Santa Clause."

Buffy laughed. "How is it like Santa Clause."

Xander laughed. "Remember when you found out Santa Clause wasn't real."

Buffy nodded. "3rd grade. Suzy Weston told me during kickball."

Dawn rolled her eyes. "2nd grade. I do everything faster then you."

Xander continued his thought. "My point is when you found out you didn't want to believe it. A part of it made you really sad because it was a happy lie. You want to believe the happy lie. You find yourself rationalizing why the lie could be true."

Buffy looked up shocked. "Wow I never thought of it that way."

Dawn just laughed. "So he will never know?"

Buffy shook her head. "This last step will be the one. If after tomorrow he doesn't know then I'm going to paint it on the kitchen wall."

The next day Buffy and Xander were waiting at the Starbucks for Angel to arrive. As he walked in they waved him back to the table they were at. Angel looked at them. "So how has work been going?"

Xander smiled "Good. It's great even."

Buffy looked at Angel "Can you sit I want to talk to you about something."

Angel looked at her. "What's up Buffy?"

Buffy played with her hands. "Ya see Angel I've been thinking about the future. I want to get married."

Angel smiled at her. "I think about the future a lot to. I think about us and I'm not going to lie marriage is in the picture."

Buffy nodded "I want to marry you Angel but the problem is no state in the Union recognizes vampires as people and since your whole not being registered as a citizen or anything it would make marrying you difficult."

Xander looked at him curiously. "Do you even have a social security number?"

Angel shook his head. "No I don't"

Buffy looked at Xander "Which means I can't technically get married to you but Xander and I were thinking?"

Angel looked confused. "Thinking about what?"

Xander knew Angel was going to lose it. "You know when a soldier is out at sea or at wartime you can have a stand in. It's kind of a proxy by marriage thing. If the actual person can't be there then you have a stand in to represent the marriage."

Buffy looked at Xander. "So that got me thinking. I could marry Xander here. Now the marriage to Xander would be real cause he can't represent a vampire. But you and I would know. He would be our stand in. I am marrying Xander and I am taking his name but really it's all as a stand in for you. Representing a marriage for us."

Xander lifted his coffee taking a sip. Angel looked at Xander. "You'd be willing to do that for us?"

He choked on the coffee for a second. He wasn't expecting that answer. He had just given him permission to marry his girlfriend. "What?"

Buffy's jaw was on the table. "Really?'

Angel looked at Xander. "I know we started off on the wrong foot but the fact that you are willing to do this for us. I don't know how to thank you enough."

The vein in Buffy's forehead was throbbing now. She looked down shaking her head. "ENOUGH."

Angel took Buffy's hand. "Buffy don't get upset it's not good for our baby."

Buffy gritted her teeth looking at Xander. "okay I gotta get a bucket of paint and a kitchen wall."

True to her word Buffy stormed to the hardware store. She bought a bucket of red paint a pant brush and headed across the street to Angels. She then proceeded to paint on the wall.

"**I HAVE BEEN HAVING SEX WITH XANDER HARRIS FOR THE LAST YEAR! I AM IN LOVE WITH XANDER HARRIS. I WANT TO BE WITH XANDER HARRIS."**

Buffy and Xander waited for the fall out. They sat in the living room waiting forever. Finally just before midnight Angel showed up knocking on the front door. Dawn greeted Angel. He looked at Dawn. "Is your sister home?"

Dawn nodded "Just remember no yelling. It's not good for the baby."

Angel nodded "Of course." He walked to the living room finding Buffy on the couch in Xander's lap. Angel looked at her. "So I saw the kitchen wall."

Buffy sighed and stood up."Angel I'm sorry I wasn't trying to be harsh. I just was frustrated."

Angel looked at her. "It's okay. I just." He looked at her and took her hand. "After reading what you wrote I feel like there is something you are trying to tell me."

Buffy's eyes went wide as pancakes. "Something I am trying to tell you. Oh my God Angel it's clear as day."

Xander took Buffy's hand. "Stay calm Buffy. Stress isn't good for the baby."

Buffy nodded and stepped away from Angel. "Okay so I never planned on any of this happening but Angel you have to understand that what we have is difficult. When I was slayer my life was about darkness but being a relationship with someone that you can't go in public with or someone you cant' get too intimate with cause they will lose there soul. Add to that you can't do any of the big landmarks every woman wants. I'm not the slayer anymore and I want a normal life. I want to be with a normal guy and I want."

Angel looked confused. "You want Xander?"

Buffy bit her lip hoping to spare him the heart break but she just nodded.

Xander stood next to her. "For what it's worth we didn't plan on this. At first it was just sex."

Buffy sucked in a deep breath. "Amazing sex."

Xander nodded in agreement. "Really really amzing."

Buffy looked at him and smiled. "My God that first week it was like I thought you created sex. I mean I suddenly understood why Anya couldn't shut up about having sex with you."

Xander smiled taking the compliment. "Me? My God I had sex with a slayer before but with you it was entirely different. If I had known."

Angel had heard enough. "Guys I get it. You two like having sex."

Buffy lost in thought laughed. "A lot." She shook her head. "Anyways through that came something else. I love Xander."

Angel looked at the two of them. "So what does this mean for us?"

Buffy spat it out. Her last nerve had been tapped dance on and what should have been obvious 8 months ago was now annoying. "We are over."

Angel nodded. "Oh." His heart sank. "I think I was happier believing the lie."

Xander looked at Buffy. "Santa Clause. I told you."

Angel sighed and walked away. Rather than stay and fight for something that didn't want him he went back to his house and packed his bags. He threw together a few things wanting to travel light.

Buffy felt like maybe she should feel guilty but the truth was she was happier then she had ever been in a long time. She had a life a future and didn't feel the need to apologize to anyone for it.

Buffy looked at Xander. "So are you worried at all?"

"What you mean about Angel? You think he might come back and attack us out of anger?"

"Oh not at all. We are out in the open now. We can tell the world we are together."

"Why would I be worried about that?"

"Well now that it's not as forbidden it might not be as fun."

Xander spanked her butt and smiled. "I say we test the theory and see if the passion is still as hot."

She couldn't help but squeal as she spanked. "Race you to the bedroom."


End file.
